Audrey's Story

There is something about Audrey.  She just glows.  I first met her at my second boudoir shoot.  She showed up in sweats,  no makeup and her hair a beautiful crazy mess on top of her head.  I thought, "Now here's a girl I can identify with!" ;)  We sat down to do her makeup, and started chatting.  As I listened to her and watched her talk, I was just blown away.  She was one of the most confident people I'd ever met, and she acted the same with her makeup on as she did with it off.  Amazing.

At her second shoot she only upped the bar.  Now a newly signed Model with IPA Agency, she brings an astonishing amount of artistry to her movement and a palpable confident radiance that is profoundly professional...and INSPIRING.

Now, I know that Audrey is gorgeous.  She has stunning features and a smile that just knocks you off your feet...but I think there is something else that's really creating the magical glow you see in her photographs and feel emanating from her.  I think she feeeeeeels beautiful.  I think she feeeeeeels like a goddess because of how she thinks of herself and chooses to see herself.  Just to be sure I asked her though...

1. What was the hardest time in your life confidence wise?  How did you feel about your body at that time?  What types of thoughts did you have about your body at that time?  What helped you come out of it and change your way of seeing yourself?

      "In 8th grade I would have multiple melt downs. The girls around me seemed so much smaller than me, especially when we would change in gym class. I already had stretch marks, my boobs were gigantic already, and I was a size 9. I thought I was disgusting. No boys seemed to like me and I just gave up. I guess as I got older I started to accept the way I was. Once I graduated high school I started to get so much attention from men, and that really boosted my self confidence! If a man loves the way I look, I don't see why I wouldn't like it!"

2. What do you love most about your body?  Why do you love these things?

     "I love my hourglass figure. I've got hips, I've got boobs, and many women would kill for that. It's womanly and sexy."

3. What are things you would consider to be "flaws" about your body, or things that you have a harder time loving about your body?  What helps you to see them in a positive light?  Do you show these parts of your body love? 

      "I have lots of stretch marks. I have a skin tone that scars very easy, and I gained a lot of weight very fast when I was in High School. To this day I hate them, but just about every woman has them. I was worried men would find me repulsive, but now I just take it as it goes. It's still hard for me when I model and show a lot of skin because I know it will be a big photoshop issue, but I'm a curvy woman and I'm no longer ashamed to say that. Plus my handsome has always told me, "If I didn't like what I saw, I wouldn't be with you." And he never skimps out on calling me "beautiful," which is always a good thing to hear."

4. What do you think is the main cause of the self-esteem issues and hateful self-talk plaguing so many women today?

     "Too many women come up hearing boys, yes I'm talking about junior high/high school asshole type boys, talk about how it's better to be skinny, tall, tan, long hair, nice ass, perfect skin, pretty smile, perfect boobs... The list goes on. It's engraved in our emotionally fragile minds. No matter how many times you hear how beautiful you are, all it takes is one bad remark about your looks and that's all we will think about. And boys in my generation seem to be so brutal!"

5. When you get down on yourself and your body image, what do you do, what do you tell yourself to lift your spirits and confidence?

     "I have sex, to be honest. Or I take racy pictures and send them to my handsome. If I hear an awesome response it will completely change my outlook on myself. Knowing I have someone that wants me like that, it's fantastic."

6. How long do you plan to be a beautiful, enigmatic goddess?

      "As long as my soul permits."

7. What would you tell a fellow female who is having a hard time accepting her body and seeing herself as beautiful?

     "Everybody has a certain beauty within themselves. Focusing too much on your insecurities will only waste time you could be using to find someone who loves you just the way you are. Yet if they think they want to look better physically, they need to really push themselves to change! Positive reinforcement within ones self is the best. Waking up and looking in a mirror and smiling is the best way to start a day."

8. What do you think the sexiest thing about being a woman is?

     "Our power to control our lovers. We smell a certain way, we walk a certain way, the way our clothes fall on our body, it is all exciting to our lovers. Yet sometimes we don't even mean to do so. And then when we do try to be sexy, we are able to drive them wild. It's powerful."

9. When do you feel the sexiest?

    "I love getting dressed up to go out. My makeup is on point, my hair looks great, and I feel like I look really good in my outfit. But that's not when I really feel sexy. I hold my handsome's hand while we are walking to our destination, and he opens the door for me and I walk in first. I step inside and notice the men looking at me, and then I notice the disappointment when they see me with another man. THAT'S when I feel sexiest."

10. When does your lover find you the sexiest (you can ask him or guess)?

     "He told me when I'm casual. (I tend to get dressed up for no reason.) When I look really relaxed, makeup done a little but nothing crazy, wearing a flannel and jeans or shorts and a t shirt with some tennis shoes. And then he promptly added, "also when you're in the kitchen." Since we all know a way to a mans heart is through his stomach."

11. Do you think your lover is attracted most to you when you look beautiful or when you feel beautiful?  Do you think the 2 are related?

    "I know he loves when I look beautiful, but he also knows when I don't feel beautiful. He would rather I felt good about myself instead of looking like I was trying too hard. I've shot with him before, since hes a professional photographer, and he's refused to shoot me because he knew I wasn't comfortable. If you feel beautiful, it will show. I believe the two go hand in hand."

Thank you, Audrey, for revealing yourself so magnificently for my lens and for this interview.  I have been profoundly effected by your words and presence and I look forward to many collaborations to come... You are an AMAZING gift to this world.

For those of you looking to ignite and claim your own beauty in the year to come, I welcome you with open arms and hope you've been inspired by Audrey's Story.  Valentine's Day is closer then you think...book now to reserve your place on my calendar and join our mailing list to stay inspired in the meantime!